|We are all unique snowflakes.|
Behold the 'Seth symbol' in snowflake form! Zounds!
Looks like I made a mistake up in the Official Comic Numbering Rectangle. I probably wrote '12,' realized there already was an issue 12, then tried to make the 2 into a 3. Great job. B-
|Brought to you in brilliant Crinkle-Vision|
Cold Seth! the issue is called. It's all ice and snow themed, see? Apparently I just forgot to put anything in the second panel. Maybe the snow is falling so thick, all we can see is a field of white?
I guarantee you this issue was inspired by the ice level from Sonic the Hedgehog 3. Sonic begins that stage snowboarding down a mountain slope, and it was pretty much the coolest thing I had ever seen (pun intended).
I grew up in Ohio, and during the winter months I would sometimes ski. It was the most athletic activity I ever did, and I find myself missing it, here in the piss-hole of Southern California. Note that I'm not wearing skis on this page, but rather I'm apparently snowboarding with those ski... stick... things. Ski poles? Is that what they're called? I refuse to Google it.
I'm being attacked by Ice Soldiers, a cold variant of the Fire Soldiers from the previous issue. One of them has a ski/snowboard with a gun on it! Oh Lordy! The other guy has rocket boots and some sort of ice laser backpack apparatus (that goes Chzt! and Zpaz!).
My response to this attack is irritation, prompting me to break the 4th wall again.
This is the first issue done entirely in marker, aside from the dialogue. I would stick with this style throughout the rest of the series, which is good, since it shows up better on my scanner. Also, I finally seem to have abandoned doing the comics double-sided. I think doing them entirely in marker exacerbated the bleed problem, finally prompting me to keep them one-sided. Hooray!
|One liners! Catch phrases!|
Using my ski poles as impromptu pole vaults, I launch into the air, attacking one of the ice soldiers with a HURRICANE KICK ATTACK! For this attack, I become nine legs attached to my disembodied head. (I stole this from Sonic the Hedgehog.)
I like that the ice soldier is wearing mittens. Mittens are superior to gloves, people. Gloves just make your fingers isolated ice sausages of discomfort and pain. Mittens make your hands badass Winter Soldiers.
"In your face!" I can't even handle this much 90's 'tude. Stop autocorrecting the word 'tude, dammit! I'm in control here! Not my tapeworm! NOT MY TAPEWORM!
As I land a punishing kick to the last ice soldier guy, I de-mask him, answering a question I just had. Their visor helmets didn't look like they would benefit the typical four-eyed Dark One minion, so I was wondering if the fire and ice soldiers were some other, more humanoid race. That answers that question! They apparently have a typical pair of eyes. I'm still not sure if they are human, or some sort of Morff-species. Who knows? Who cares?
Striking a leisurely pose as I continue to fly through the air, my smugness in my own victory comes at a cost. I wind up face first in a thick snowbank, buried up to my legs. It's refreshing to see me suffer a little at the end of one of these, rather than my typical consequence-free victory.
What, only three pages? I bet that's what you're wondering. Well, tough shit! Sometimes I would slap together a pathetic handful of pages and call it a day.
Go. Enjoy your 4th of July. I'll have more of this nonsense posted soon enough.