Friday, July 3, 2015

Sether in the Morff Issue #12

Happy 4th of July Eve!  What better way to celebrate than by looking at a stupid comic book I made when I was too young to understand the horrors of adult life?


Cover Page


Cover page, not title page, idiot.
Pretty standard.  Look at that little blue spark on my finger tip, and my smug little stance.  Great call, making my mouth and eyes the same hard-to-see yellow as my noodly limbs.  Am I even wearing pants?

F-

Page 1

Budda?
I think I meant to put a title in that blank space above our introductory passage.  I count at least two spelling/grammatical errors.  Off to a great start.

We finally see one of the 'space cycles' mentioned in Issue 2.  They're clearly a ripoff of the speeder bikes from Return of the Jedi.  However, I recall the coloration and armament of these bikes was closer to the Swoop Bike toy from some Star Wars spinoff story.  Does anybody remember Dash Rendar?  I do, and hate myself for it.

Note my legs and feet are a circular blur as I run; this is yet again another visual stolen from Sonic the Hedgehog.  I read the Sonic comic books from Archie Comics back in the day; indeed, they may have been the primary motivation to make my own comics.

Look at me yawning as I effortlessly dodge laser fire.  What an insufferable ass.


Page 2

That's a lovely stain on the lower left.

The return of the Spaze Cannon!  See, I told you it would come back, and you doubted me.  What did I ever do to you?  Oh yeah?  Well, you can shit right off, buckaroo.

Where was I?  Uh... lasers are happening again.  The dreaded Spaze Cannon once again proves capable of dropping my candy ass like a sack of bricks.  I like the attempt at 'lighting' as the cannon fires.  ZORCH!

Page 3

Sallote!
"Put him in!" says the Dark One Man.  I think I meant 'bring him in,' but whatever.  I'm tossed into a hovercraft and brought to the Dark One himself.  In classic James Bond Villain fashion, rather than just execute me on the spot, he orders me put in... the Death Ray!  DUN DUN DUUUN!!

Apparently it lowers me into a glowing blue beam with a pair of mechanical pincers.  Seems like a rock-solid strategy.

'Sallote' might be my favorite spelling error in the entire series.  Salutes don't even make a sound, but I thought that particular minion's salute deserved a noise.  I couldn't be bothered to look up how to spell 'salute' though.  I was a busy man.  

This page is the first appearance of the 'fire soldier,' a subclass of Dark One's minions.  He's that guy in the orange suit with the red visor-helmet.  Color coordinated for your convenience, they are armed with flame throwers (which I don't think they ever use).  I feel like the visor helmet is ripping off Boba Fett's helmet from the Star Wars.  *belch*

Page 4

GORF
Coming to in the nick of time, I freak out, break free, and... swoosh towards the control center of the Death Ray.  Note that I can still fly without Super Seth power being active.

The skull-popping out of my head scream was stolen from The Mask, perhaps my favorite movie.  I watched it an insane number of times as a child.  Like, a pathologically unhealthy number of times.  There's a scene in the movie when Jim Carrey screams, and his tongue, eyes, and skull pop out of his head with all the glory of crappy 90's computer graphics.  An image that stuck with me?  Steal it, shove it in my comics, done.

Page 5

Death Count: 6
Crashing head-first into the control room causes it to explode.  I then rocket off into the sky, escaping Dark One's base unscathed.

This is the first time we see Dark One's base.  It's on a weird elevated plateau thing.  I'm not sure if it's actually the Death Pod half-submerged in the ground awaiting launch or not.  I think it's just a large dome structure.  Derp.

Page 6

An End.
Three loop-de-loops, and Seth returns home, safe and sound.  "Seth! You made it!" shouts Jess.  "Of course," replies Seth.  What a smug douche.  He's learned nothing, hasn't grown as a character.  No danger can possibly threaten him.  *sigh*

It's nice to see Doc and Prometheus again.  Prometheus seems to be wearing... odd clothing, not his typical dress/robe thing.  He's also missing his tail.  Was Prometheus supposed to be a girl?  What the hell does that say about my brain?

Dark One is pissed that I got away.  That's what you get for not giving me a double-tap when you had me helpless and at your mercy, asshat.  Oh well.  He'll have many more opportunities to kill me in the future.

This is a pretty good 'standard' episode of SITM.  Seth gets into something vaguely dangerous, but wields his preposterous powers and gets away scot-free.  Oh, the joy of adolescent power fantasies. 

Is anyone even using those little navigation links at the bottom of these posts?  Is it just easier to consult the navigaty-doo on the right hand side of the BLOG?  Maybe I'll add some later.  Fffftt...

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